Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Ugly Is as Ugly Does

Ugly is going out of style. It's being eradicated. With all of these makeover shows, there is no excuse to be ugly anymore. Plastic surgery is in and so acceptable nowadays that if you are so messed up, people just assume its by choice. "I guess that how she wants her face." (shrug)

I don't have a problem with corrective plastic surgery. If your lip is messed up or something, you can fix it. However, this cosmetic crap is getting out of hand. Nowadays the only way to tell if people are naturally ugly is to see how their baby turns out. Plastic surgery can make you look better, but it can't correct that cross-eyed gene that you are gonna pass on to your child. Make sure you see baby pictures of the person you might be thinking about marrying before you do the deed. If not, you're going to be looking at your baby, wondering, "Where'd he get those big-assed ears from? He doesn't look like either one of us." Oh, yes he does. He looks just like you when you were in the seventh grade. Those ugly genes are getting passed on. Screw the college fund, now you gotta put something away for the make-over fund.

I read a while back that a couple in Florida got breast implants for their 16 year old daughter. Seems like everything that is messed up happens in Florida, must be the sun. Anyway, at first I thought, "This is ridiculous." This girls is way too young, and what kind of message are the parents giving her? "You won't get anywhere in this world without big boobs."?

But after thinking about it further, I'm thinking..."We have not actually seen this girl; maybe she actually needed a little bit of help." Let's be honest. In this world looks are pretty important to some people. Who knows? Maybe breasts were cheaper than braces. Maybe her parents had some kind of master plan. "Ok, hun. We'll buy the boobies and maybe you'll meet some nice man, who'll fix your teeth."