Sunday, December 02, 2012

Chicken Lifestyles of the Rich and Fabulous

I know that some people think that I talk about my chickens too much.  Yes, I name them.  Yes, I can tell them apart.  Yes, I watch them through my big front window like I'm watching "As The Hen House Turns".  When you only have a few, it's easy to see the story behind their actions.  And there is always a story if you look hard enough and have a good imagination.

Don't get me wrong; they are incredibly stupid.  They rely on their tiny brains, that have the memory span of about two days.  I have three especially brain-handicapped hens.  "Fucking-New-Chicken" likes to be in the tree.  "Betty White" is in love with F.N.C. and "Snow White", Betty's  sister, won't leave Betty's side.  (Told ya there is always a story.) They decided back in the summer that it was better to sleep in the apple trees.  I decided last night was their last night of doing that. The night before we had winds gusting upwards of 30 mph with rain.  Snow was blown into the rose bushes and got stuck.  Ergo the wet, nighttime, ninja-style, head-lamp toting, ladder climbing excitement did commence to get them into the new coop that none of the other chickens want to be in.

But I digress.  What I really wanted to tell you about is this obnoxious hen house from Neiman Marcus.  I'll let you check it out and think about it on your own.  Like Neiman Marcus reps say, "You too can be a gentleman farmer."  (For only, $100,000.  $3000 of which will "generously" go to American Livestock Breeds Conservancy .)  

Check out this short commercial video if you don't believe me on how asinine this is.

1 comment:

  1. I have spent many a night knocking chickens out of a tree. I feel ya, sister.