Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Pondering VD


I don't understand why cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about Valentine's Day the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? And the makers think that it is perfectly acceptable to charge a hundred bucks or more for something that with a little ingenuity, I could make with shoe-strings and pantie liners. OK, not as attractive as it could be, but I'm making stuff up off the top of my head here.

But I bet if you asked any man, he'd rather have his Valentine buck naked with a 7-11 rose bud between her teeth, than pay the hundreds of dollars for lingerie. Lingerie that he won't get to enjoy if he gets the size wrong.

Too big? "Just how fat do you think I am?" Too small? You are just confirming the what we already know. You-are-a-moron. Stick with "I love you." Or jewelry.
So anyway, tomorrow night I'll be at the Satin Love Orchestra Valentine's Day Ball with my man dancing the night away. It's kind of a disco cover band so my husband can boogy down and actually look good this time, since that's how he aways dances. BWAAHAHAHA!


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